Sleepless in Nis

I can't fall asleep. Again. I'm suffering from an eight day old jet leg. Or I just have so many things on my mind.Probably the latter.
This so-called vacation turned out to be much more and less than planned.
I got sick. I certainly didn't plan that. The weather is getting better but it's definitely not summer anymore in Serbia.
And being here without M. after so many years makes me feel weird and a bit out of place. I know, it's silly, since this is where I lived for 26 years, until I moved to the capital. But so many changes happened since then.I haven't been in Nis without M. since 2002.
Things are different when I'm here alone.I'm not used to that anymore.I don't know how to handle it.I feel artificially single.I can't explain it.But it is a small burden.Friends have changed, moved on, so have I, but with M. And now I'm reviving these old friendships just because he's not here. Otherwise, we have our own enjoyable routine, in this habitat. Now I'm all by myself in this city of my childhood and growing up. Admit it, it's a little bit scary.